Can you believe we are in a new decade? I couldn’t have imagined the year 2020 when I was a little girl. Remember all the movies that took place in the future and how futuristic 2020 was depicted? Flying cars in most of them!
I know that many of you had an amazing year, and I also know that some of you may have had some ups and downs. Whatever your experience was, it was yours to have. There are lessons in both.
There is no better time to reflect on a year gone by then just before a new one begins. If it was a great year, what made it so great? What worked? What can you take into 2020 to continue having such positive momentum? If it wasn’t a great year, and you experienced those ups and downs, struggles, challenges, and possibly heartbreak, what caused it? What didn’t work? What do you intend not to take into 2020? What do you intend to do differently? What are your intentions for this next decade, this new chapter in your life, and what can you do to make 2020 great? Most importantly, what can you do, and need to do, including change, to feel the way you want to feel?
Most of you have been here with me all year, following my journey that I’ve been sharing through these weekly teachings, whether it is on my blog, in my weekly coaching emails, social media, or as a client. My lessons have been plentiful this year, and there is so much that I’m taking forward with me. I wanted to end the year, and the decade, by sharing three of my greatest lessons. These are the biggies that I’m holding onto as I step into 2020 with so much excitement.
LESSON 1: FEELING GOOD IS OUR ONLY WORK
By work, I mean what I believe should be our main focus each and every day. When we do things from a place of feeling the way we want to feel, it all flows together with so much more ease. When things do go off track, it makes it easier to recalibrate back.
For me, my #1 goal this year was to continue the practice of strengthening my inner world – to feel joy, gratitude and abundance daily. To take inspired action to do things that make me feel joy, gratitude and abundance daily. To fully and completely feel it so deeply that love just oozed out of me in my relationships, with my clients and in these weekly teachings for all of you.
Bringing in joy and gratitude makes me feel so incredibly abundant, and also helps me to make decisions with confidence and trust by doing what feels good for me, also affects all those around me in such a positive way – Contagiously Positive 🙂
How does this new thought feel? “Even though I don’t have everything I want yet, I trust that I will, and in the meantime, I’m so grateful that I have everything that I need right now, in this moment.”
Taking action from this aligned place of pure gratitude, and trust, that you can be, do and have whatever you desire, you will make decisions that align with where you want to be, not in the lack of where you currently are if you are feeling frustrated that you don’t have everything you want yet. This will not only get there faster (even though timing usually happens on its own), but your journey will be so much more fun and fulfilling. This is because taking any inspired action that is aligned with a positive feeling is the right action. It’s the right action because it feels good and feeling good is our #1 desired outcome anyway – regardless of what goal you set, there is an emotion attached to it that you think you will achieve when you get “it.”
Trust me when I say that feeling good is the work. And, trust me even more when I say that you can be, do and have whatever you want. When you start with the being (feeling good), especially gratitude for where you are and what you have now, it falls into place exactly as you planned, and sometimes, even way better than you could have ever imagined.
I am taking this into 2020 with a knowingness that nothing else is more important than how I feel because when I feel good, I can do good. When you feel good, imagine all the magic you can bring into your life and the lives of those you love.
Even before the New Year, set an intention for how you want to start out 2020.
How do you want to feel?
What are your desires, dreams, goals and wishes?
What do you need to let go of, and just leave behind?
Who do you need to forgive?
How can you bring in more love?
How can you love deeper?
What can you do starting right now to start off feeling exactly the way you want to feel?
LESSON 2: SETTING HEALTHY BOUNDARIES
Setting boundaries isn’t just for other people, but also with ourselves.
This year I practiced saying no when I needed (wanted) to say no. I worked on saying yes when I truly wanted to say yes (even if it was scary). If an external circumstances or person that I couldn’t control (which we can’t) was pulling me into the negative vortex, I asked myself, “how can I react or respond to this in a way that serves me, in a way that enhances my core desired feelings, or in a way that won’t make me take up permanent residence in negative-ville?”
I stopped trying to change them and started changing me – my reaction and response. When you set a personal boundary like that, what you get is emotional freedom.
I also slowed down when I needed to slow down – which meant listening to my body and doing what I needed to do to recharge my batteries. Why do we believe that it is okay to run on empty? It isn’t!
I stopped coming down on myself when I didn’t do something or say something that I think I should have. No more should’ve, could’ve, would’ve. When I got off track, I reset and got back on. I set a boundary with myself that allowed me to be imperfect and that it was okay not to always be okay – another magical way to gain emotional freedom. And a truly powerful healthy boundary was that I gave up the belief to hustle, hustle, hustle, stress, stress, stress, stress my way to “success.”
What are the boundaries that you need to set for yourself?
Where do you need to challenge your excuses as to why you think you can’t do something?
Is there something, or someone you need to stop trying change that you Have no control over?
These were all healthy boundaries set in place that I can’t even imagine going back to my old ways, so I am also taking them into 2020.
LESSON 3: BE WHO YOU WANT TO BE
I read this beautiful book called, Conversations With God, by Neale Donald Walsh. One principle that stuck with me was the formula I used to set my intentions. The new formula is BE – DO – HAVE.
By setting the intention last year to work the work of taking care of me, and my inner world, it changed everything for me. I really felt the need to go deeper into my growth and learning. I focused more on who I wanted to be and less on what I wanted to have. I still had goals on things that I wanted, but I practiced staying connected to the being part because it really is the most important. I didn’t want to have “the stuff” without being happy.
I’ve been working on my 2020 goals and I’m going to continue with last years intentions, which is adding goodness into my life, not setting resolutions on things I think I need to give up. I will continue to shift my thinking towards intentions (I intend to be healthy and happy) because this year I realized that the more love, gratitude, amazing people, and joyful experiences I had, the less room there was for the other stuff anyway. So why focus on what we should be giving up on, being overcome with feelings of lack, and frustration, when we could be focusing on all the things we actually want to fill our lives with and who we want to be (how we want to show up for others and ourselves). This is way less stressful, way more fun, and definitely way more soul fulfilling.
Today I leave you with this question: before you set your goals, what are your intentions for 2019?
Finish these sentences with the formula BE, than DO, than HAVE
“This year I intend to be…”
“This year I intend to do…”
“This year I intend to have…”
Now that you have clear intentions, set any goal you have around who you want to be, what you want to do and what you want to have. If it doesn’t align with BE – DO – HAVE, if it doesn’t make you feel good, don’t waste your precious energy on it.
If there is something that you want, who do you need to be to achieve it? If it’s more money, how does someone with the amount of money act? Start acting (being) that way even before you have the money.
If you want a relationship to change, who do you need to be so those changes can happen? Don’t ask for someone else to be something that you are not willing to be?
Something that I ask myself when I am being challenged is, “How would the contagiously positive girl in me act, react or respond to this?”
Most importantly, 2020 will be a year of being guided by my heart. I don’t know about you, but I’m ready for a year where we all lead from our hearts.
I wish you all a year full of love, happiness, abundance and so much joy.
Laurie-ann, The Contagiously Positive Girl
If strengthening your spiritual, emotional and mental muscles is a practice you want to bring into 2020, UNLEASH Your Inner Contagiously Positive can help you do just that. I made the digital course 9-weeks, because you don’t workout once and have a six-pack. The same principle applies to strengthening our inner world.