You have set a goal and after a couple of months, it falls by the wayside, never to be seen again. Did you not achieve it because you were too lazy, procrastinated or unclear about how to achieve it? In my opinion, no, I don’t think that is why at all.
I used to set goals just to set them. Meaning, January 1stwould approach and I would sit down and list all of the things that I thought I “should” list out to achieve throughout the year. My old pattern looked like this:
Thought: “I should save more.”
Goal: Put $50 dollars a month into savings account.
Thought: “I should probably work out more.”
Goal: Work out 3 times a week.
Thought: “I should do more to improve my personal/professional development.”
Goal: Read more books on personal/professional development.
Usually, by February 1st, my soulless list of “should” do this was forgotten and lost.
“If your goals aren’t synced with the substance of your heart, then achieving them won’t matter much.” Danielle Laporte
Most of us have goals and we set them to give us clarity and some guidance to help us focus on the year or task ahead. Whether it is your career, relationships, health, or personal or professional development, you’ve most likely set a goal this year. But have you really thought about why you want? Is it a goal or a true desire that you are inspired and motivated to achieve? Will it enhance your life? Will it bring you joy?
The obstacle that many of us hit is that we don’t take the time to figure out if the goals we are setting are realistic. Meaning, do they align with your true values, wants, desires and needs. When your goals are in alignment with what you truly desire, you set yourself up for success because your goal makes you feel jump out of bed, let’s do this motivated.
Here are two ways to figure out if your goals are soulful and heart-centered and what you truly want.
1. Dream (visualize)
Begin by closing your eyes and visualizing what you want, or even goals you have already set. Every time a thought or idea comes to your mind, pay attention to how it makes you feel. If it makes you feel giddy, joyful, energized and wanting more, that is probably something you are going to want to spend more time thinking about. If it makes you feel unmotivated, kind of icky, or it lacks any feeling at all, it might fall into the category of something that you thought you should want, but you don’t really want.
Questions to ask during the visualization:
Will it expand my life?
Will achieving this reflect my true values and hearts desires?
Will it excite me? Does it excite me?
Will it fill my life with more soul fulfilling experiences?
2. Write it Out
Now you can begin to pick out the goals that are based on the most heart-centered, soul filling possibilities that you imagined through visualization.
Take those energizing ideas that came to you while you were dreaming, and write them all down. What will it require? What are the possibilities? What will it take of your time and even finances to achieve it? Oftentimes, we set a goal without really thinking about the commitment. Its not that you don’t want to do the work, it is about becoming clear on what work you actually do want to put your pressure time, money and energy into.
The dreaming phase is important, but it is easy to become motivated in this phase only to see it dwindle when we begin because we haven’t thought about what it is going to take. When you write it all out and even do the research, you can check in and see if you are still lit up and are willing to go the extra mile.
In the book, The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck, Mark Mason asks: “What are you willing to suffer for?” Meaning, what temporary sacrifices are you will to make to achieve the things that you most desire? If you want a new career, but you are 100% not willing to go back to school, you might want to choose an option that doesn’t require additional schooling. But, if you are willing, and truly want it, temporary sacrifices included, you will not only do it, but you will be motivated to do it. It might not feel effortless, but it won’t feel daunting because you it is backed by inspiration.
“That shit that makes your heart beat faster and your eyes glow when you do it or talk about it, no matter if it’s hiking, yoga, gardening, painting, sex, meditation, photography, going for walks, helping others – do that. Do it as often as you can. Because that’s what life is about. Creating as many passionate, happy moments as possible. Don’t let anyone stop you from doing the things you love – not even yourself.” Unknown
Create a life that you love, want and desire. Aligning your goals with your heart is a beautiful act of self-love. Forget about what everyone else wants or what you think you should do, or want, and begin to do and be what you want.
Laurie-ann Sheldrick, The Contagiously Positive Girl